Good news for fans of weird horror: American Horror Story: Freak Show returns tonight after a Thanksgiving hiatus (and death theories are already flying for the episode, titled “Blood Bath”). Neither show creator Ryan Murphy nor the AHS series look like they’re going to go away anytime soon, especially since Freak Show has reportedly set a ratings record for its network, FX. The show’s already been renewed for a fifth season, and speculation has been flying as to what the subject is going to be (the current fan favorite theory is aliens).
We’re as clueless as the rest of you, but we do have some great/weird/overly ridiculous ideas for American Horror Story, for season five… and beyond.
American Horror Story: Back To The Future
Asylum took place in 1964, Coven jumped back and forth between happenings in the 1830s, the 1970s, and present day, and Freak Show is set in the 1950s. It’s established that Ryan Murphy likes to travel back in time. So what if he travels forward in time instead? Let’s get some futuristic horror up in here! (We’re actually not quite sure what this would entail but we like surprises.)
American Horror Story: Supernatural
We’ve already seen witches and ghosts, so why not go full supernatural? Vampires, werewolves, faeries, the choices are endless. There are a lot of ways this could go (one of which being gothic literature inspired monsters in the Victorian era, a la Penny Dreadful), but we’re weirdly attached to the idea of it being set during the silent movie era in Hollywood, with actors and actresses. Maybe someone could play a horror vampire version of Charlie Chaplin!
American Horror Story: Glee
Freak Show has elements of musicality in it but in season five they can go ALL THE WAY. Like Les Miserables all the way, where every single line is sung and there are elaborate dance numbers everywhere. Like with Glee, this season could also be set at a high school, and the season would culminate in a disgustingly gory prom, Carrie-style… only the blood bath won’t be that of a pig’s.
American Horror Story: Clone Club
Sarah Paulson is already playing two characters this season with Bette and Dot, so a season having to do with clones could let other actors try their hands at a similar endeavor. Tie a convoluted government conspiracy in with a Pleasantville-esque suburb setting, plenty of secret affairs, Stepford Wives and/or Husbands, and of course murder, and we’re in business.
American Horror Story: Zodiac
Ryan Murphy loves creating serial killers. Obviously. Three seasons of this show so far have featured a serial killer, so it’s a natural fit for Murphy to take on one of the most famous, or at least use him as a springboard to a fictionalized version, along with other famous killers such as John Wayne Gacy and Charles Manson. Set in the 1970s and featuring a murderer that grips the nation through his interaction with law enforcement and media, this season could follow in the Freak Show footsteps by not featuring anything overtly supernatural.
American Horror Story: Gold Rush
Much like Coven, this one could be a mix of modern times in a ghost town, with flashbacks to when the community was thriving. The Gold Rush was a pretty big deal in American History, and seeing it touched upon with tinges of horror could be interesting.
American Horror Story: The Great Gatsby
The 1920s was a period lightly touched upon in Murder House, but a season heavily influenced by it, either by featuring ghosts from the period or by being fully set in it (and still featuring ghosts, because this kind of setting just screams spectral themes of a dying American dream) could go over really well. Murphy apparently loves immersing himself in past decades, and with the unique style of the Roaring Twenties, he could find his ultimate Happy Place.
American Horror Story: The Midwest
A group of people living in a podunk town in the middle of nowhere. Nothing scary happens, it’s just a series detailing their extremely boring lives. The ultimate American horror story.
American Horror Story: Roanoke Colony
Why not take one of the greatest American historical mysteries and utilize it for this show? The Roanoke Colony could fit perfectly. Still unsolved, the reason why this community disappeared could be explored. I’m feeling The Hills Have Eyes style monsters, for some reason. Plus, Murphy hasn’t gone this far back in time before.
American Horror Story: Porno
We all know what Ryan Murphy really wants is to make fancy psychosexual porn, so he should just embrace that for an entire season instead of adding in squicky two minute sequences every other episode. There could even be a hardcore bondage porno movie production serial killer plot, because, as previously mentioned, Murphy loves serial killers almost as much as he loves weird sex scenes.
Tell us your theories for American Horror Story season five! And if you have your own ridiculous and/or fantastical ideas for future seasons, toss ’em in the comments section.
Written by Christine Duong and Max Kelley